Story Rhymes #45 Project Ho – (MC Shan)

1411_shan old school

Song: Project Ho
Album: Down By Law
Year: 1987
Producer: Marley Marl
(By the way, listen to the Juice Crew Podcast)


Continuing the countdown of the greatest story rhymes in Hip Hop’s Golden Era ….

MC Shan is our narrator for this story, he says it will never be repeated … hey maybe he’s never performed it lol
Anyway, people who’s been around the way will recognize the star of this tale of the Project Ho

According to Shan, if you look half decent and kick it right, you could get ol’ PH for one night
Shan’s cousin introduced her to him, though he never told him that she was a ho

Her description: “jet-black hair, big brown eyes
She seemed to be smart conversation-wise”

Shan tells her she looked good and slipped her his number, and made sure to tell her if he’s not home call him back (See this was before cells and texting, and voicemail)

He comments he didn’t know whether she was poor or rich, again because his cousin told him nothing, either way he knew he was destined to smash so he continued on

Later he’s uncovered storied about her, but the way that she looked he didn’t believe it at all, one day she called Shan and for the sake of this stoory we are calling her “Kim”
Things progressed, and Shan’s cousin came over and demeaned Shan for being seen out in the streets with Kim … called her a Garden Tool
The cousin explained that Kim was a Project Ho … now if the Cousin actually TOLD him in the first place it wouldn’t have been a problem, you cant get mad at Shan since HE introduced them!

Shan thought his cousin was cock-blockin, Kim called him again and Shan played his card to see her; rappin her up he asked what she liked to do etc. etc. She says:

“Depending on the weather and my mood that day
Sip Dom Perrignon at a Broadway play
The other things are not good to mention
Like coming to my crib and relieve my tension”

I’m guessing that relieve the tension is flick the bean lol Now Shan simps out and tells her he was in love from the day that they met, it worked though because after a few hours on the phone Kim was down!
Funny thing is shan had to get off the phone with her to clear his line … he didn’t have call waiting (Hey this was his first album LOL)

Shan takes her out, things went well, he figures for what he spent on her though he better get some ass, after turning on the radio he’s like so what’s up?
Now he was either in a limo (How? dunno since he cannot afford call waiting) or a Cab (But then how did he turn on the radio?) anyway, he says he yells to the driver “Homeboy my place”

Once they got to Shan’s place he had assorted wines and a Jacuzzi … damn fancy, get her boozed up and undressed; smart. To remind you that she was a ho Shan says believe it or not Kim’s words were:
“Show me to the room with the King-Sized Bed” … now what if he only had a queen, or a full? LOL

Shan feeling good, smashed her into submission, but after she left he started to itch … immediately going to the doctor, the doctor said:

“You can’t cure it with soup or laying up in your bed
You’re lucky that you came to see me early, my man
Cause I guess that you know that you got it, Shan”

This is a sign of the times back then … Shan’s response was basically “welp” she was a project ho LOL

Funny story, great sample … love this era of Hip Hop

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