Least Likely 80s and 90s Pop Culture Crushes

December 18, 2012


You’ve been on this site and read my randomness and seen how much I love women, you’ve even seen my Appreciation website where I display my affections
My love of women knows no bounds, but sometimes it should … for one reason or another in my life and times I’ll see a female who I just like … I just want and I KNOW I have no business being attracted to them! My curse is typically I can find something attractive in most people (or at least I look for it) …
Anyway I’ve compiled a list of crushes I had back in the day who are NOT typical or readily obvious
… and slightly embarrassing

But I have fun here right? So … my Top 10 “Odd” Crushes

Odd because not many people were crushing on them
Odd because they are white? Nah … coincidence lol
Odd because What was I thinking!?

I started from less absurd to most … least I think

Sally Field


I enjoyed the Gidget reruns, what of it jerk?
This isn’t crazy because Sally Field was attractive and I’m sure lots of men wanted some of that flying nunn …
Pretty face, Shape was on point, and I like brunettes
Odd because
What was I doing watching it in the first place?

Markie Post


Here’s the thing, When Night Court was on there was no internet, and You didn’t talk on the phone when it was on … and a lot of kids had to go to sleep after it went off … then there were more important things to talk about the next day of school like GI Joe, Transformers, Snapping Bras so I didn’t know that people were lovin Markie Post like I did until Twitter lol either way. I mean A Team (Two different characters, AND Buck Rodgers? … YES!

Marlee Matlin


lol So I was watching the Show Reasonable Doubts in the 90s and something about Tess Kaufman did it for me
Maybe it was because she was Deaf and still working
I know it has to do with my weird fetish for Lawyers and Attorneys … don’t judge me
And I like her eyes … so there … never mind she kinda looks like Fivel
She was hot on Seinfeld and especially The L Word

Mary Lou Retton


No Surprise with this one since my Love for female athletes (In particular Track and Field) … Gymnastics is big for me too
Anyway, I didn’t think she was hot per say … BUT her legs (you know me and legs) were top notch at the time and that’s all I needed to be lusty
For some reason she reminds me of Little Debbie Oatmeal creme pies.

Bebe Neuwirth


Lilith Sternin!
She was quiet, Strong, Mean, Demanding, and wore the glasses and tight bun … and when she first let her hair down and took the glasses off
Mannnnnn I wanted some of that Chalky, pasty woman lol

Calista Flockhart


Another Lawyer? Yep. See?
Nevermind the fact that my GI Joes had more meat on them, when Ally McBeal came out I wanted some Calista Flockhart
… think it was the hair and the lips … and they were always talking about sex … and the lawyer thing, pretty eyes too

Lisa Rinna


So … I use to watch Days of Our Lives, you got beef!?!
Billie on Days of Our Lives was the hotness … it was the lips and the short haircut, mostly the lips
I thought Lisa Rinna was everything back then her AND Kristian Alfonso (Hope Brady)

Rebecca Lobo


Sure she resembles the Denver Broncos logo BUT! I liked her … I’m sure it was because she balled out in UCONN (Balled out prolly wasn’t the best phrase here)
I thought she was dope … I remember they were playing and here hair was sweated out and she had her jersey rolled up…. good times

Tori Spelling


Yeah … I dunno.
Why the long face?
There were CLEARLY better options on 90210 for me to choose from but Donna needed me, I know what it was … it was the breasts
She had the breasts and for some odd reason that 3 foot wide space in between them I liked lol
So I overlooked her pelican appearance for the slim with boobs look

Paige Davis


Okay listen damnit, I can like HGTV! I enjoy interior design effwads!
This doesn’t count as 80s or 90s but it’s still least likely!
Trading Spaces was a dope show … and I watched it because I liked the challenge and transformation of people’s places but also because of Paige Davis
… and I don’t like perky happy people either but it was something about her … and how she looked in Jeans, like she’d be … good at … design.

Oh and Shoutouts to:

  • Katherine Hammond
  • Rue McClanahan
  • Joyce DeWitt
  • Cindy Williams

… All of who ALSO would’ve gotten it


See what courage it took to admit those? I cannot be the only one who had less than stellar crushes … comments?





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  • http://twitter.com/chapmanrunner Mr. Serious (@chapmanrunner)

    Oh my. What a list. You need a purple heart awarded to you for bravery in releasing a list with the likes of Tori Spelling, Beb Neuwirth, and Rebecca Lobo on it.

    Now Markie Post and Paige Davis…. I second that!

  • davenappy

    Wow. Forget Purple Heart, maybe the Medal of Honor for some of these. Wow. I’ve heard you mention Tori Spelling before, but to hear the reasoning behind it? *Shudder*

    Nothing unlikely about Markie Post. All the dudes in school talked about her great..um…eyes!

  • http://thebrownspoon.com Roddykat

    I can safely say that I cosign at least four (Sally Field, Marlee Matlin, Lisa Rinna, and the smoking Bebe “Lillith” Neuwirth) of your mentions (and the shout out to Katherine Helmond starting from Soap days on). Not a bad list, sir.

  • Leroy Jenkins

    Hey i THIRD Paige Davis DAMMIT. That girl was too hot for HGTV. I liked that show too (uping the stakes on bravery thread) but wow…Paiges cute smiley mug had me comin back for seconds…thirds even. I know this is 3 years old blog, but she left that big impression on me. Let me link you to something my freind. Paige davis actually stripping in a thong (for charity that is) Which makes her that much more intriguing. Its the right level of class & ass.

    Heres a link: http://www.neocelebs.com/fg/p/paige_davis_01/00.html
    Now after looking at that, you cant tell me there isn’t a God. The definition of Come hither thighs (soft yet firm looking) and that bodacious backside. I mean who knew? Even those epic jeans didnt do her justice.

  • http://underscoopfire.com/ Mr. Serious

    I still cant get over Lobo. LOBO?!?!?!?!

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